BEMIDJI — Just a few weeks before his cancer diagnosis, 3-year-old Gunnar Haseltine had been laughing while wrestling with his father. He seemed happy and healthy, and any thought to the contrary was nearly unimaginable.
Then he started feeling sick. At first, it seemed like just a cold, but after a few days his skin took on a yellow hue and he became increasingly despondent. So his parents, Paul and Courtney Haseltine, took him to the doctor.
ADVERTISEMENT
“It was like a bad cold or a really mild flu. He was complaining about his feet hurting, so we thought maybe he’s just going through a growth spurt. Then his skin started to get yellow and he got more and more checked out,” Paul shared. “We were advised to bring him in and we did. Then it was just a bombshell dropped on us.”
They were told that it was likely Gunnar had cancer. Before they knew it Courtney was flying with him from Bemidji to Fargo, with Paul close behind.
“My wife and son were in the helicopter flying to Fargo, and I was following behind in the car. I was crying so hard that I developed a headache, and that’s what forced me to stop crying,” Paul said. “It’s my son, it’s my boy. It’s so overwhelming.”
The doctors in Fargo confirmed the diagnosis, informing the couple that their son had an acute form of leukemia.
“My first reaction was anger. How dare they even speak such evil thoughts into existence,” Paul recalled. “Then it went from anger to extreme sorrow. I don’t even know if it’s fully set in yet.”
Gunnar was diagnosed on Feb. 22, and since then he’s been receiving treatment in Fargo. The reality has been devastating to his parents, who have watched the little boy they love so much struggle with pain, a lack of energy and unfamiliar environments.
“It’s been absolute hell,” Paul said. “He’s 3 years old, and even though he’s small, he’s a warrior. But it’s been hell on everybody.”
ADVERTISEMENT
Community support
But the Haseltines haven’t been alone in their struggle. Throughout the last month, they’ve been grateful to the friends and family who have shown them their support during such a difficult time.
“Our faith, our friends and our family have just been so pivotal,” Courtney shared. “(They’ve) come to see us and check in on us.”
A part of that support has been through a which so far has raised $53,000 to help the family through this crisis. Some of the 278 donors, as of Tuesday morning, are people the Haseltines know, while many others they’ve never met.
“We’ve had (so many) people donate, and we don’t even know who some of them are — just a connection through a friend of the family or a friend of a friend, even people we’ve met in passing,” Courtney said. “That’s been shocking, wonderfully shocking, and it makes us feel seen in such a horrible season of our life.”
Paul and Courtney moved to Bemidji shortly before Gunnar was born, to be closer to family. Since their son's diagnosis, they've been staying in Fargo.
Following the move to Bemidji, Courtney has been working as an online personal trainer and health coach, and Paul has been working in contracting and as a handyman for his father's company. But neither have been able to focus on work since this health crisis took over their lives.
“I couldn’t even imagine working, I feel like I’d be betraying my son and myself,” Courtney shared. “I feel like 100% of my focus needs to be on him right now, and I’m very, very grateful that I don’t have to work right now.”
ADVERTISEMENT
Both Paul and Courtney are spending all of their time caring for their son and advocating for him.
“Now it’s just about finding the best treatment plan for him and making sure we’re being good advocates. We’re really trying to be in tune with his wants and needs and navigating his emotions as a child,” Courtney explained. “(We want to) make sure he has the best chance of health, not just in the short term, but for his long term health.”
Looking toward healing
Gunnar is currently undergoing chemotherapy, and while it's helping treat his leukemia it’s also been difficult on his body and energy levels.
“Sometimes he doesn’t want to walk or move, because his body just hurts,” Paul said. “He’s kind of checked out because of the pain he’s in, and he’s lost some of his confidence.”
When he’s well, his parents describe Gunnar as confident, kind and someone who loves to make others laugh.
“He’s one of the most confident little boys I’ve ever met, and he’s so friendly,” Courtney said. “He makes it a point to be a friend to everybody, he’s really silly and he loves to make jokes and make people laugh.”
Gunnar’s also adventurous, loves the outdoors and monsters, and playing with the family dog. With time and treatment, his parents know that he’ll make it back to that.
ADVERTISEMENT
“We have a very strong faith as a family, and I already believe Gunnar’s healed,” Courtney shared. “Acute (leukemia) means it's happening very suddenly, but the reversal can also be fast and sudden. So his chances of remission and full healing are very promising.”
For now, the family is focusing on one thing at a time — making it through the next hour, the next treatment, the next day.
“When you’re faced with overwhelming obstacles and situations, you’ve got to just focus on one tiny step in front of you at a time,” Paul explained. “Your first step, your next step, and as you go you can look back and see you’ve made it through the jungle.”
They’re also working to protect Gunnar and make the experience and treatment as comfortable and positive as it can be.
“I just want our spirits to stay bright, especially Gunnar’s," Courtney said, "so that his childhood and the magic behind that can be protected through this process.”
To support Gunnar and his family, visit
The Trust Project
